Hello World

Hello and I'm back. Well well, it has been a few months since I posted and I guess I should update everyone as to how I am currently feeling towards life and all things mushy.

Life, well I've come to realise its full of surprises, yes, It's as common a catch phrase if ever I heard one, a typical cliche I know. But its true. I've spent so much of my past trying to control my future, ensuring I avoid judgement and prove people wrong, I always wanted to be great, you know, better than the rest, Im not sure whether it was a result of youthful optimism or something deeper, something real. But the thing is, I don't know how much of a say we get. I know I sure as hell didn't see this pregnancy coming along. It wasn't planned, and it bloody well scares the crap out of me. But do you know what, Im ok, and Im going to be ok, because whether I like it or not, tomorrow will come, time stands still for no one and I have no choice but to move forward.

We all have our goals, our ideas and dreams, I'm guessing my pathway needs to involve this. Maybe we need to loosen up on our ideas of perfection, maybe the roads never do run smooth. But I'll get there, I'll get my dreams, I guess this is my chance to take control of my compulsive need to control the details and just let it all go.



With time being nothing more than the trust we have in one day following the next and the hope that the people who loved us yesterday will be there to love us again tomorrow, our creations are not only, (when well depicted) the link into sharing what we value as our world, but the only true evidence we have of change. To say there is no room for new art is to say there is no room for tomorrow.

Oh Romeo

There is so much pressure placed on finding your mr or miss perfect these days, what with all the movies, books and social ideals. Your partner doesn't represent you, you aren't judged by who they fall short of, they're not you in another, they're not supposed to be who you've always hoped yourself to be, they're not yours, your not theirs, you aren't judged by what they do, as what they do is not a reflection of you, you aren't with them because you think your mother will disapprove, or your ex-best friend will be jealous, or you'll be skyrocketed to stardom within your group of friends. They are just someone, being a someone that likes to spend time with you. Just as you are you, flawed but brilliant all at once, when you're spending time with them. And it kind of takes the pressure off finding perfection, because perfection in a partner will never exist. We're all just people, trying to be happy, let it be.

A Grey Day

Today was a grey day. Have you ever had one of those? Where it seems like no matter what you do to try and clear the dark clouds that seem to be suffocating your freedom, the world just pisses on you. I hate my job, its making me depressed and I'm in one of those places where my attitude is kind of holding me back now too. Im not all optimism, but really? Who is in these kinds of situations? Those goody two-shoed air-heads who's lives are illusions of cotton candied hopes and dreams, thats who. Well I have hopes and dreams too, and if that means staying in bed all day to re-write my CV so I'm seemingly employable only to have my computer crash and lose the entire thing as I'm up to the reference phone numbers then so be it. Life is twisted, and you know what life, I'm twisted too.